WOW-zah

I just called John and told him I thought I was going to have to take his son to the emergency room for the first time. But then I used my little brain and saved the day. No ER visit needed. What, pray tell, was the problem? The very small child stuck his very small finger (although, his fingers are considerably larger now than when we first gave him the ball to play with) in the hole of a very small whiffle ball. And the aforementioned finger would not come out.

I went in to the pack-n-play room to get Dex out of play time and clean up his mess. He looked at me and held up his hand. Hey, look! I have a ball on my finger! Why, yes, cute child. Look at that. A ball. On your finger. Let's just take that off now, shall we?

Except it wouldn't come off. Would not budge. Protesting child was squirming in my lap as I took him in to the bathroom, hoping that some hand soap would do the trick. Nope. No good. What else do we have that is slippery? Lotion? Oooh! I know! Personal lubricant!

We happen to have a stash in Dexter's room. Typically used to lubricate the rectal thermometer. Today, used to slather all over a small finger, in hopes that I could pry the ball off without doing any further harm. All the while I am imaging taking him to the ER, with a ball attached to his finger, and wondering how THEY would remove it.

Fortunately after a minute of wiggling, the ball popped right off. Finger is fine. Gave the very small child some Motrin, held his hand under cold water for a bit. He is now sleeping away, with the injured finger held fast in his mouth (it was his prime sucking finger, of course).

It's been a hell of a week. Why do kids need teeth, really? Couldn't they just get dentures? Or couldn't teeth just all come at once? All 20 of them? At a time that is not also cold and flu season? These molars, man. They are kicking my ass. I feel bad for the poor whiny child who is constantly batting at his ears. But at the same time - OMG, the WHINING! Make it STOP! And how much Motrin and Tylenol am I allowed to give the child before it makes holes in his stomach or something?

The bad thing is that only ONE molar has broken through. And it's taken at least a week for that to happen. So am I going to have to deal with the whiny man for three more weeks? Ugh. Let's hope it gets better, because right now... WOW. Just... Wow.

Fortunately, Dex is still ridiculously cute, as seen here:

Pay no attention to the bruise on his forehead. Let's just say that we're learning that he needs to wear shoes. ALWAYS.

Driving a car takes fierce concentration

Close to being on his way to another bruised forehead. Mom grabbed a leg, saved the day.

I think the water comes out the other end, buddy. Just guessing here, but you might have more luck if you turned the cup over...