If you ever have to

If you ever have to go to a Celebration of Life for a child (and do I ever ever hope you never have to), this is the kind to go to.  Big yard on the river.  Sparkling sunny day.  Twenty or more kids running wild, riding Strider bikes over ramps, climbing through tunnels, chasing bubbles, playing soccer.  Moms who haven't had a chance to catch up in a while, doing just that.  Dads who are often left out of the loop with these mom/child play dates blowing bubbles, lifting hurt kids off the ground, taking pictures.  Babies sitting just off to the side, watching the melee with glee.  And the entire undercurrent - this is so Bear.  Bear would love this.  Isn't Bear such a special child, to have made all this possible.  Because it's true.  Without Bear, there would be no Little Explorers group.  No hiking and biking play dates, no pot luck food lunches.  We don't get together with this group as much since we've moved, but we stay in touch.  We go to Longwood with them.  We go to play dates on Fridays when we don't have school.  We see their pictures on Facebook and we re-connect when we can.  They are our friends.  Thank you, Bear, for making this great group of women and kids.

It was a relatively easy event to attend.  It was a hard event to prepare for.  It was hard reminding Dexter that we were going to a party for Bear, but Bear would not be there.  It was hard hearing him ask "Why do people have to die sometimes?"  It was hard telling him that people's bodies stop working sometimes.  Usually it happens when we are really really old.  But Bear was very sick, and that made his body stop working.  It was hard, but somewhat heartwarming, to hear his reply.  "I am going to live until I am NINE THOUSAND!"  Oh, I hope so, sweet boy.  I really really hope so.

Longwood. This time with sunshine.

Gorgeous day for Longwood today.  we spent the afternoon.  We also forgot hats and sunscreen.  Because it was kinda cold.  So we came home with four tired, sunburned, windburned family members.  And lots and lots of pictures.

Found you some red buds, Grandma

Minor miracle.  Everyone is looking at the camera.  Nobody is crying.  Some people might even be smiling.  Pay no attention to that leaf in Erin's mouth...

Dex and I thought this tree had flowers that looked like stars

Goofy crooked smile.  Yes, she's about to eat that flower, too.

Poor flowers were not prepared for the grazing baby

Dexter's favorite daffodils

ANOTHER miracle!  2 kids, who MIGHT even be touching!  Excellent background!  Both kids looking in my general direction!

NO WAY!!  It happened TWICE!

Silly kid

Fun with fountains

Adventures in Solid Food

Erin has been adventurous this week with her eating.  She has enjoyed broccoli, cauliflower, cucumbers, tomato, and chicken.  She has NOT so much enjoyed sweet potato and pear.  The jury is still out on cottage cheese - she thoroughly enjoyed putting the spoon in her mouth.  The actual cottage cheese on the spoon?  Meh.  And while at Applebees on Friday for lunch, she chomped on some spinach, pasta, chicken, and bread stick.  A vast majority of it ended up on the floor.  We left a big tip...

Here's a video of her talking and eating a cucumber at the same time.

Speaking of talking, holy moly is this baby ever chatty.  Not even chatty.  YELLY.  Yesterday at 4AM she was lying in bed yelling.  She has not yet learned her inside voice.

She has also, finally, figured out how to roll over both ways.  So she can sleep on her belly, and then VOILA!  Roll over on her back when she wakes up.  Thank the lord.  It makes for much more peaceful nap times.

Sweet potato and pear.

Cucumbers and tomato.  I sent a text to Aunt Jeanne, expressing my displeasure.  Cucumbers gross me out. HOWEVER, Dexter actually tried a cucumber when he saw Erin and Daddy eating some.  Me?  No way, man.  I don't even like cucumbers touching any food I am trying to eat.

Roughage

Erin very sweetly shares her grass with the dog.

TWC is a bunch of lying liars

I checked the weather forecast this morning, before I decided to go.  It said "expect dry conditions over the next six hours."  And then, you know, tornado watch for this evening.  So I figured we'd better go this morning.

To Longwood.  Land of fish.  And fountains.  And more fountains.  And maybe some more fountains.  And Dexter asked why there were so many fountains at Longwood.  Seriously, child?  Are you complaining?  Oh, yeah.  There might be some flowers thrown in there, for good measure.

And then, as we were walking out in the far far reaches of the garden, stuck by Dexter's favorite goddamn fountain, wet stuff started falling from the sky.  And soon things looked like this:

Bite me, Weather Channel

Some older couple with an umbrella was walking behind me, and the guy commented "Why isn't that little boy wearing his hood?"  Which, 1)  Why do you give a damn, really, and why would you say something, next to that little boy's mother?  And also, 2)  Have you ever tried putting a hood on a kid who doesn't want to wear his hood?  Much less an Autistic kid?  It's 70 degrees out.  If he chooses to get his head wet, more power to him.

Dexter managed to see his favorite Italian Water Garden fountains before it started raining.  Hmmm.  Wonder why there's so many fountains at Longwood, boy who has watched these fountains intently for a good three years?

Searching for more fish to feed our bread to.  No fish in the big lake.  Just angry geese.

Cherry trees are pretty even in the rain

As are the tulips.  But I didn't get a chance to go to my favorite tulip location.  Too rainy.

We had to take refuge inside.  Some fountain chasing had to be done.

At least the sun was smiling inside.  Dexter?  Not so much with the smiling.

And getting both kids to look at the camera, never mind smile, was impossible.

But this baby?  She's easy, on her own.  Smile?  Sure thing!

Dex just wanted to play with bubbles.  Again.

I only had to save Erin from imminent, head-crashing death once today.  Not bad.

Blurry, terrible, but the best picture I have of Erin playing with water fountains.

She sits still and is FAR easier to photograph than her brother.

Except for the wompi faces.  I blame teething.

Yeah.  He still does this.

Yeah.  He's still cute.

Numb

Dexter's little friend, Bear, died last night.  He was four.  He had been in the hospital for a little over a week with unexplained brain swelling.  The doctors never figured out what was causing the swelling, and were never able to get it under control.

I haven't told Dexter yet.  He knows that Bear was sick and in the hospital.  We made him a get well card and a "Wake up, Bear!" video yesterday.  We were in the middle of buying his family a gift this morning when I got a phone call from a friend, telling me he had passed away.  And I couldn't tell him.  I just...  don't know how.  How do you tell a four year old that his four year old friend has died?  Without scaring the crap out of him?

After two days of frustration with Dexter, though, I definitely found myself softening a lot today.  "Mama, can I have a hug?" he asks, dripping wet after swimming lessons.  Well, yes.  Yes you can, sweet boy.  Because sometimes four year old boys go to the hospital and they don't come home.  So, tell you what.  How about you have a hug.  Or ten.  Or maybe I just don't ever let go.

Bear, November 2010

Bear getting ready to jump off the stump.  April 2012

Bear holding on to Dexter's hand.  April 2012

Bear riding his Strider bike in DC, with cherry blossoms over his head.  March 2011

Six Months

My brain had to work too hard yesterday at Foxcatcher Endurance, so it's not firing on all cylinders today.  (I hear you, smart ass people, who are wondering if my brain EVER fires on all cylinders.  Yes, yes.  I hear you.  You're funny.)  So you'll get a quick post today, with some cute baby photos.

1)  It is definitely spring here.  The daffodils have bloomed, as has our forsythia.  Our pear trees have flowers on them.  Everyone has snot streaming out of their noses and tears flowing freely from itchy eyes.  Dexter was also sick all weekend, and is finally fever-free but now is sporting one hell of a cough.  But, hey!  We have daffodils!

2)  Erin was six months old yesterday.  I didn't have any time to take a picture of her on her six month birthday (how come when you call it six months it doesn't sound like a big deal, but when you look at it as HALF A YEAR suddenly it makes it seem like the baby is really really old?).  I was at Foxcatcher all day, and John was in charge of both kids.  I don't think that "take a picture of the baby on her six month birthday" was tops on his list of priorities.  He was focused on keeping both kids alive.  Which he did.  Admirably.  So here's a couple pictures from today.

3)  Erin has been doing this for a couple weeks.  She likes gnawing on spoons, and is mildly entertained by a sippy cup with some water in it.

Today we upped the ante and put some actual food in front of her.  Roasted sweet potato, to be exact.  She knew just what to do with it.

I'm not positive she enjoyed it, but she certainly knew what to do with it.

Happy Half a Year Birthday, little girl.  Man, do you know how to make a Mama feel old...