What is God?

Yeah.  That's the question Dexter asked me this morning, after he read some saying we have posted on the fridge.  Some saying I have nothing to do with, and Dexter found the other day, and asked me to read to him.  Something about how God can't be everywhere and that's why he created mothers.

So he asks, What is God?

And I answer, Oh, Baby, I am so not the person who should be answering this question.

But I gave it my best shot.  Because I don't really know how to explain God to a grown-up, much less a three-year-old.

God is someone that some people believe in.  He's kind of like a pretend Mom or Dad, who watches over people and takes care of them.  Some people believe in God.  Some people don't.  And that's ok.

Dexter says, I believe in God.

OK, kiddo.  That's fine.  Mama does not believe in God, but you are more than welcome to.

Dear Sweet Jesus, kill me now.  I am not equipped to answer these questions.  I struggle already with where to send him to preschool next year.  Christian preschool, non-affiliated preschool?  We have some awesome Christian preschools around here, but I don't really want God drummed in to my child's head.  I don't think I can deal with it.  But then again, if we want him to learn about God and Christianity, he's gonna need to get it from somewhere.  Because it sure as hell isn't going to come from me.

This makes my head hurt.

In other news, it looks like the final deadline for Baby Norman is next week Wednesday.  If she doesn't decide to come out on her own before then, induction will be Oct 17.  Mostly because induction increases your chance of a C-section, and they don't wanna do a c-section on a weekend if they can help it.  Slackers...  :-)

Cute pic from Longwood.  A while ago.  Like, August.

A Small Motorcycle

At 12:15 last night a small child appeared in our doorway.  Which kind of freaked us out, as he has NEVER, EVER gotten out of bed and come in to our room.  So John scooped him up and brought him in to bed for a while, as we tried to figure out what was wrong.  He said that a small motorcycle woke him up.  Hmmm.  OK.  Time to go back to bed.

Some time, either later last night when John took him back to bed or this morning when the boys got up, John asked again what woke Dexter up.  A small motorcycle, he replied.  The sound was coming from Mama and Daddy's room, so he came to investigate.  And then John burst out laughing and fell on the floor, trying to breathe.  Apparently the small motorcycle is Mama.  Snoring.  Really loud.

John is really hoping that the snoring subsides when the baby arrives.  It doesn't bother me at all - I sleep right through it.  But apparently it is affecting the quality of sleep of the entire household.  Sorry, boys!

Couple pictures from today, and a video from soccer.

Soccer jumping jacks (click for video)

Dex and Daddy went to pancake breakfast at the airport, and apparently Dexter got to sit in the seat of a very tiny airplane.  Not this one.

The boys watching football after dinner tonight.

Weekend Fun

Grandma and Grandpa came to visit last weekend, to hang out with Dexter and to babysit for us while we went to a wedding.  We were cute:

As were these two boys - perhaps two of my favorite grown-ups ever.  Adam, by the way, is a brand-spanking-new Dad.  Congrats!

Dex went to soccer on Saturday morning, and everyone went to watch, and fall on the ground peeing their pants with laughter when he did jumping jacks.  Oh, my lord.  The funny.  I did not get a picture or a video.  But trust me.  Hysterical.

A little dribbling during warm-up

Click above for video of Dex scoring a goal.  I was not filming when he went up to the goalie and, instead of kicking in the ball, he just hugged the goalie instead.  He's a lover, that one.

After soccer Dex went to a free festival with Grandma and Grandpa, where he did a whole lot of jumping on a moon bounce.  Or three moon bounces.  And then dinner at Applebees.  And then fireworks at Fireworks Wal-Mart.  It sounds like a lovely time was had by all.

Sunday we had a tree to remove.  Grandpa brought a chain saw and a tow strap, so we could try to pull it out with the truck.  The tree, however, had other plans.

John would like one of these chain saws, please.  It's only (gulp) $600...

Dexter checked out the stump to see if it would make a good drum.

Then he got his shovel so he could help Daddy

And then he used the stump as a drum while Daddy shoveled.  He is tremendously helpful.

Also, cute.

We brought the truck around and made an attempt at pulling out the tree.  The tree didn't budge, but we made some nice mud marks in the yard with the truck tires.  So Dexter decided he would push buttons in the truck while Daddy and Grandpa dug some more.  Unfortunately, this killed the battery in the truck, so pulling trees out was no longer a possibility.

Don't tell the child, though.  He was insistent - let's hook up this rope to the tree!

One doesn't need a working battery to push buttons in the truck.  With the dog riding shotgun.

Who needs a truck when you have Daddy and Grandpa?

Dex helps fill in the hole

Grandpa comes over to help out.

Front of the house with no tree.  Ahhhh.  Much better.

No progress on Operation Baby Girl Norman.  Today is my due date and she remains firmly implanted in my belly.  Ultrasound still looks good, non-stress test is fine.  Everything is fine.  And apparently the ultrasound says this is gonna be a big old baby.  She might kick her brother's ass.  Or, hopefully, the ultrasound is wrong and she'll be cute and tiny and will slide right out no problem.  We'll have to wait and see.

Hey, Aunt Jeanne!

The above video cracks me up.  Because he's OBVIOUSLY excited about me video taping him in front of his flowers.  And also FAR more interested in the strings on his pants.  Or...  something.

Anyway!  Aunt Jeanne!  Look how big our flowers are!  They went from this, which you helped us plant:

To this.  Which has already lost some flowers because I pulled out the dead stuff last week.  So long, marigolds.

Dex is also obviously thrilled about doing this little photo shoot.  I took him away from throwing baseballs in to the ball pear tree.  He was displeased.

See?  Super psyched.  But check out the alysum that still looks and smells awesome!

Plus now we have a cool little place to walk and sit, since I pulled out the smelly marigolds that I hate.

And the flowers look pretty good, despite serious amounts of neglect on my part.

After our flower photo shoot we played in the yard for a while, and took some pretty pictures with the nice blue fall sky.

Got photo-bombed by the damn dog

And then Dex rolled down the hill a bit.  Click below for video:

I have been reprimanded

So, apparently the power cord thingies I talked about in my Longwood lights post are, in fact, fiber optic cables.  Attached to a light source in some box far away.  And the box has some light in it or something, and that light in the box changes colors, and then all the little fiber optic cables change colors, thus making an entire field of Longwood lights change colors all at the same time.

And John thought I didn't ever listen to him.  Whatever.

Funnier and Funnier

This child, man.  The things he remembers continually amaze me.  Events that have slipped my mind ages ago, he still brings up and remembers clear as day.  Things I never thought had any impact on him clearly did.  He has memorized how to read a ton of words.  Sounding things out is not his forte, but if you tell him what a word is, chances are he will not forget it.

But the thing that has been KILLING us recently is how goddamn funny he is.  Mostly without even meaning to be funny.

Sunday morning he and Daddy were outside playing.  It was chilly.  John was wearing shorts.  John said something about being cold, and for the rest of the morning Dex called him "Cold Guy."  Throw your ball, Cold Guy.  Play catch with Mama, Cold Guy.

He's got some new stock sayings:  "Oh, MAN!"  "Ooooh, yummy!"  Or any time I tell him what we're doing, or what we're eating, "Ooooooh, eggs!"  His typical "SURE!"  Pretty much any stock phrase I might say is guaranteed to come out of his mouth these days.  He's a mini-Mama sometimes.  With some Daddy-isms thrown in there, too, like when you ask him to do something and he says "Hold ON!"

He's learning to tell time on a real clock - I think today he got 5:30 pretty well pegged, and now knows that Daddy will be home at 5:30.  And Daddy had better not be late, because damn if the boy doesn't know what 5:30 looks like on the clock.  He also knows 12 noon, because that's when his bus comes.

In other fantastic milestones, I think we've finally gotten him to put his own shirt on without freaking out.  He still can't take a shirt OFF, but hey.  We'll take it.  This morning I left his clothes on his bed and went in to my room to get dressed.  He came wandering in to my room with pants, underwear, backwards short sleeve shirt, backwards long sleeve shirt.  I was so damn proud of him for putting both shirts ON that I didn't have the heart to tell him they were backwards.  So he wore backwards shirts all day.  His teacher asked him if he dressed himself...  :-)

Finally, Soccer Shots started a couple weeks ago.  This class is much more up his alley than the spring class, as it's Dex and a bunch of other 3 and 4 year old boys.  Who don't listen.  So Dex and this one bored little 5 year old girl look like stellar fantastic brown-nosing rule followers, while the rest of the boys are usually off in a corner wrestling with each other.  It's awesome.

Actually, one of the hardest parts of soccer is convincing Dex to actually PLAY SOCCER, instead of playing on the playground

I do believe he's actually supposed to be doing this.  Rule follower.

Lights. Camera. Tired.

Last Wednesday we went to see the "Light" display at Longwood before it closes on Sept 29th.  It's been open all summer.  But it also doesn't get dark til really late in the summer.  So we waited til fall when it gets dark at a much more toddler-friendly hour.  Apparently the entire rest of the world was thinking the same thing.  So we looked at lights with ourselves and about 70 trillion other people.  It may well have been more crowded than the lights at Christmas time.

We had a nice time, but the child was tuckered out by the time we finished looking at outside lights and wanted to go inside the conservatory.  So we leaned his stroller seat back, gave him a jacket for a blanket (blankets are the farthest thing from my mind right now.  I was hot all night long), and let him rest for a little bit while we wandered through the main part of the conservatory.  I don't know why HE was so tired - he had his butt pushed or carried around Longwood by Daddy.  We're the ones who walked forever.

It's hard to capture the lights with a camera.  I certainly tried, but you can't fully appreciate it without going.

The boys feed the fish and check out the lights on the other side of the pond.  Piece of bread for me, piece of bread for the fish...

Pretty candle lights inside the Loft Treehouse

I think that might be a posing child.  Or a child who just bumped his head.

With Daddy

Oh, happy day!  Dexter's favorite fountains now have LIGHTS!

Watching fountains from Daddy's back

Moon setting over the big lake, and you can see the lights on the other side of the little pond.

We went back toward the pond to see the lights over there in the dark.  They changed colors, as did the little power cord thingies.

Field of Light

Then we wove our way back through the crowd to see the Light Towers - recycled plastic bottles with lights in them, stacked in towers.  Dex was not psyched about the music that was playing, but he did enjoy the flashlight that a Longwood employee gave him.  Mostly he enjoyed shining it in Daddy's eyes.

That little beam of light toward the bottom of the tower is a small child and his flashlight.

These changed colors, too

From there we walked through the forest of lights to the Bee Treehouse (I'm sure it has some other name, but we call it the Bee Treehouse)

And we checked out the bees

And then walked through the woods til we found the spot where Dexter jumped off the stumps with his friends, when we came here in the spring.

We were super close to the lights here, so we spent a long time checking them out

Dexter was checking out "his favorite light."  Poor tired kid - he was fading fast.

Zipped quickly through the Conservatory to see these lights.  John declared them his favorites.

They changed colors, too

And, finally, the very cool looking lights right outside the entrance

I've been working on putting the baby's room together this week.  I think we're pretty much ready up here.  Still getting a book shelf from Grandma and Grandpa next weekend, and then all things will be in here.  Shout out to Grandma and Grandpa - thanks for the awesome dresser!  We picked it up last weekend.  It's beautiful, solid oak, Amish made, and should last this child a lifetime.

And it even has clothes in it.

And a snazzy chair from IKEA next to it.

Based on my last doctor's visit, this child is going to take her sweet-ass time coming out.  She's not dropped at all, not anywhere close to being ready to be born.  But all the ultrasounds and non-stress tests look good, and they know me REALLY well at the hospital these days.  Outpatient check-in on Friday took me about 25 seconds.  Sweet...